S01E01 · SCENE 21/21 · 13:35
Good News, Bad News · Comedy Club Stage
Stand-up: Dating & Cotton Balls

Jerry performs stand-up on dating pressure and the mystery of cotton balls.

13:35→15:42
in the episode · 2m 07s · S01E01
Stand-up: Dating & Cotton Balls

What happens

13:35–15:42

Jerry compares dating to a job interview with a chance of nudity. He rants about women's inexplicable need for massive bags of cotton balls, which vanish in two days, only appearing later as tortured remnants in wastebaskets. He once used a left-behind bag as cockroach deterrents.

WhereComedy Club Stage
DriverJerry
Positionact2 · setup
ThreadLaura's Visit

Key lines

from this scene
13:36

JERRY: How's the real estate business?

13:48

JERRY: You handle any of that commercial real estate that...?

13:59

JERRY: Let's go. You're on-stage in 25 minutes.

15:00

JERRY: Two or three look like they've been through some horrible experience.

More quotes on the Seinfeld Wiki →

Scene DNA

weights 0–1
deadpan0.7
absurd0.6
social rule violation0.2
monologue

Beats

14:20Jerry rants on cotton ball consumption
15:12Jerry used cotton balls as cockroach deterrents

Scene in the episode

13:35–15:42
B · Signal Analysis

Clips from this episode

fan uploads · YouTube · matched by frame
Includes this scene · Jerry Doesn't Know What Women Are Thinking | The Seinfeld Chronicles | Seinfeld · Seinfeld
Kramer's First Appearance | The Seinfeld Chronicles | Seinfeld · Seinfeld
First Introduction To KRAMER!! - Seinfeld Pilot Episode "The Seinfeld Chronicles" · The Seinfeld Chronicles
George & Jerry's First Hang Out | The Seinfeld Chronicles | Seinfeld · Seinfeld
Kramer's First Appearance On The Show | Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards) · Scene City
You're Engaged? | The Seinfeld Chronicles | Seinfeld · Seinfeld
Seinfeld "Pilot" - Laundry Talk · blinkie1234
Seinfeld Pilot, 'You are engaged' · Jeevan B Manoj
First Episode of Seinfeld - It's signals Jerry, signals! · ClipsAboutNothing
Seinfeld - Mets Blew It · Top Clips
Seinfeld - Men have No Idea what woman want....spot on · Werner Adendorff
Seinfeld - Laundry Day · TrickyMovies

GIFs from nearby episodes

matched by frame
seinfeld GIF by hero0fwarseinfeld GIF by hero0fwarseinfeld GIF by hero0fwarseinfeld GIF by hero0fwar
Powered by GIPHY

Props in this scene

shop
Links may earn SceneClip a commission.

Merch on Amazon

sponsored
AMZN
Good News, Bad News merchShirts, mugs, posters
Shop
AMZN
Jerry Seinfeld merchFigures, shirts, gifts
Shop
AMZN
Seinfeld giftsGift ideas for fans
Shop
Links may earn SceneClip a commission.

Where to watch

sponsored
NFLX
Stream all 9 seasonsNetflix · subscription
Watch
BD
The Complete SeriesBlu-ray / DVD box set
Shop
EP
Good News, Bad NewsDigital purchase
Buy
Links may earn SceneClip a commission. Illustrative availability.